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Last Updated on 06-Jan-2016
Category: Electronics

Topic: TV

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    1. Why do mice always choose to run across the room in the middle of good TV shows and never during the commercials? (Contributed by Don F.)
    2. Can you seal a TV with Video Tape? (Contributed by Don F.)
    3. Why is it that when you finally get a chance to watch a TV show that you always seem to miss its a repeat? (Contributed by Don F.)
    4. Why are they called talk shows when most of the people on them end up screaming at each other? (Contributed by Don F.)
    5. When people recognize somebody they seen on TV why do they always ask them "Hey didn't I see you on TV"? How are they suppose to know who was watching them? (Contributed by Don F.)
    6. Why do they call it "cable" when you're getting "hosed"? (Contributed by Don F.)
    7. There's so much comedy on television. Does that cause comedy in the streets? (Contributed by Don F.)
    8. Why do they call it a TV set when you only get one? (Contributed by Don F.)
    9. Why doesn't cable TV show anything good? (Contributed by Don F.)
    10. Why is it that in the 50's and 60's we were aggravated when we had to watch a repeat on our 1 or 2 channels and now we pay the cable companies extra money just to watch the repeats? (Contributed by Born Loser)
    11. Why is it that we consume more energy looking at a blank wall than we do watching most TV programmes? (Contributed by esusz)
    12. Why is it that nobody on TV has time to watch TV? (Contributed by Vanbooven)
    13. Why is it that on any TV show if a woman is running away from someone she will always trip and fall? (Contributed by Vanbooven)
    14. Why don't they have a knob on the TV to turn up the intelligence? There's a knob called `brightness' but it doesn't work. (Contributed by Gallagher)
    15. Why do they call it a black and white television instead of colour? Surely black and white are colours? Couldn't you sell them as two colour T.V.'s? Then would you be able to charge twice as much for them as an ordinary colour T.V.? (Contributed by Alex Petty)
    16. How come during summer break in July and August when I finally get the chance to stay up as late as I want to watch my favorite TV shows they are ALL repeats? (Contributed by Dale F.)
    17. How come network TV programmers have a worse track record at picking popular TV shows than most any group of four people in a coffee shop or bar? (Contributed by Richard Rhodes)
    18. Did you know that men don't care what's on TV? It's what else is on TV that matters. (Contributed by Jerry S.)
    19. In the old days a comedian took a dirty joke and cleaned it up for radio. So how come today he hears a clean joke and dirties it up for television? (Contributed by Jim Poserina)
    20. Is there a law that requires the major networks to show commercials at the exact same time? (Contributed by The Vent on AccessAtlanta.com)
    21. When you turn your TV off for a week shouldn't the cable company subtract it from your bill? (Contributed by The Vent on AccessAtlanta.com)
    22. How come you never see any spankin' on MTV's Spankin' New Videos? (Contributed by The Vent on AccessAtlanta.com)
    23. How come when you are watching TV the good movies are always on tomorrow night? (Contributed by The Vent on AccessAtlanta.com)
    24. Why do people in the movies hardly ever have TV sets? (Contributed by Stacy Wallace)
    25. If you installed The Clapper on your TV would your TV turn itself off whenever the commercial for The Clapper was on? (Contributed by Matt Diamond)
    26. Why is it that the most expensive special feature on the VCR or TV never gets used? (Contributed by Don F.)
    27. On some TV movies they show a notice at the start indicating that it has been formatted to fit your TV screen. How do they know how big your TV screen is? And what do they do when you have different size TVs in your house? (Contributed by Michelle)
    28. How do you distinguish TV channel waves from radio waves? (Contributed by Gregory Lam)
    29. Why do people always say 'Hi Mom' when they see they are on TV? (Contributed by beefstu)
    30. Do you think someone may have set up surveillance equipment by your TV? Afterall, how else do the people on TV know what channel you're watching? (Contributed by C.B. Droege)
    31. If our country has the best technology, how come half of the country can't figure out how to program a VCR? (Contributed by TheStuff46)
    32. How come in a movie or on TV, when a television is turned on, the exact information that was needed is always being aired on that channel and at that particular time? (Contributed by Kristin)
    33. With 50+ channels on TV, how come you can never find something interesting? And how come there's always 5 of the same type of show on at the same time? (Contributed by Steven LaPha Jr.)
    34. How come it takes three weeks to hook up cable, but only three days to disconnect it? (Contributed by The Vent on AccessAtlanta.com)
    35. How come the only access that 'cable access' doesn't give you, is cable? (Contributed by Jonathan)
    36. If not for television, what would we be thinking? (Contributed by The Vent on AccessAtlanta.com)
    37. What is the correct psychiatric diagnosis for a person who tapes the home shopping channel? (Contributed by HaLife.com)
    38. Why does everyone suddenly decide to call whenever you put on a good movie? (Contributed by Ossie Michelin)
    39. Is television simply a device that permits people, who haven't anything to do, to watch people who can't do anything? (Contributed by Fred Allan)
    40. How come all the cool people on TV and in movies always live in warehouses? (Contributed by Zyana)
    41. Why do we say there is nothing on TV tonight when there obviously is something on? (Contributed by Herman)
    42. What happens if you don't show up for a tribal council meeting on Survivor? (Contributed by Pk)
    43. How come people say that TV is a dull and stupefying waste of time with no real benefit to humanity when there's so much fine entertainment on them 24-7? (Contributed by Art Harden)
    44. Why, when a television show comes on, does the announcer say, in English, that if you want to hear the program in Spanish, tune your SAP button? If the person doesn't understand English, how are they supposed to know what to do? (Contributed by Valerie)
    45. Why is it that whenever you casually watch a certain TV show it is always a repeat of the same show the next time you watch it? (Contributed by Tom C.)
    46. Is there any 'open-captioned' television? (Contributed by Valerie)
    47. Why don't we get paid for watching paid programming? (Contributed by The Vent on AccessAtlanta.com)
    48. How can more than 100 cable channels all go to commercials at the same time? (Contributed by The Vent on AccessAtlanta.com)
    49. How do TV channels fit a supposedly 30 minute long program and two 10 minute advert breaks into 30 minutes? (Contributed by Master Mantis)
    50. Isn't 'Reality' and 'TV' an oxy-moron? (Contributed by Jon)
    51. Why do networks advertise their excellence on their own stations? (Contributed by A.J. Bodnar)
    52. Why are the commercials for cable companies on cable but not on regular television? Don't they want the people without cable to buy the cable? (Contributed by Dennis)
    53. How come people on TV never finish their drinks? (Contributed by Steve)
    54. Why did the TNT Network have a slogan that said ‘Watch the New Classics on TNT’? If they are Classics then they cannot be New, right? (Contributed by Marz)
    55. Why does the TNT Network claim ‘We Know Drama’? Doesn't every TV network know drama? (Contributed by Marz)
    56. Ever notice that most children who are permitted to watch television more than six hours a week cannot spell 'television'? (Contributed by Greg Edmonds)
    57. How come, on some TV shows, the opening credits finish up just in time for the closing credits? (Contributed by PawPaw)
    58. Do they call television a "medium" because it's neither rare nor well-done? (Contributed by Bee, Gosford Australia)
    59. Why do they have credits at the end of movies and tv programmes when you can’t even read them because they are going up/down the screen SO FAST? (Contributed by FORDMANMAL)
    60. What is the point of having high-definition television if you don’t have high-definition eyes? (Contributed by The Vent on AccessAtlanta.com)
    61. If you read a lot of books, you are well-read, right? So if you watch a lot of TV, are you well-viewed? (Contributed by Ralphie)
    62. Isn’t the Evening News where they begin with ‘Good evening’ and then proceed to tell you why it isn’t? (Contributed by Ralphie)
    63. How come there is nothing REAL about Reality TV? (Contributed by The Vent on AccessAtlanta.com)
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dcfowler@interbaun.com

Sherwood Park, Alberta, Canada
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